Do You Have Swine Flu?

If you must know immediately, click here.
To protect yourself in the workplace, here is a suggestion via the EnchilaBrother in Law.
And for further community service, your Fearless Enchilada here, reporting on the latest conspiracy theories:

1. It came from Aruba. This, according to a woman commenting in the NYT with hysterical capital letters. Do with this highly sensitive information what you will.
2. Donald Rumsfeld owns lots of Tamiflu stock and he wants to make more money. Wouldn't put it past him.
3. It's a plot (probably by Dick Cheney) to overthrow Obama, the first Black president and a Democrat. Obama went to Mexico recently, saw a guy who dropped dead the next day. Things that make you go hmmm....
4. It's a plot to close the border with Mexico and dump all the illegals back in there.
5. It's the gringos who are to blame for their porkpacking operations in the state of Veracruz.
6. It's a plot against carnitas. (This is my theory).