Spring collections 2009...Benign,Bothersome and Bewildering.

Here are some early entries that remind one of a 3 legged race horse: LAME. How did they make it into the starting gate, let alone the Tents?

Nicole Miller (left). enough said. That stuff should stay on the rack in her many,many,many shops and not crowd a runway. It's one less collection we all need to sit through. It's never been directional and still isn't. That is a perfect example of collection by committee, only everyone is out to lunch. This one gets a C -. C- for cheesy minus charm.

Isaac Mizrahi (right) was as I expected, an expectorant. One coughs so as not to choke. Yes, he is creative, and even a good designer. He just suffers from a bad case of speigleritis. That is a disease whose symptoms are one looking at oneself in the mirror more than looking hard at the clothes you are about to unleash on an unwitting public. Liz Claiborne or Chez Mizrahi.... either way you spell it it comes out looking and tasting like a dish that should be seriously altered or removed from the menu. Abstract embroidered trench coats over short shorts , all sorts of tortured combinations which should translate to style, fall flat. Maybe he should do what most of the others do, leave the job in the capable hands of his design team and stick to schtick. I have to give Isaac a D for Derivative and Dull and Dreary.

DVF (left) was another example of design for design sake. She is an icon, much like Carolina Herrera and the clothes have a loveliness to them. They also go on and on, from one theme to another, none of them holding the hem of the one that came before. Just a hodge podge of looks that in all are just too many and too unimportant in terms of runway material. Season after season, I feel it is the sort of collection better viewed in her shop. It's an opportunity for her to flex her considerable muscle and clout. As the president of the CFDA and the wife of Barry Diller and legend she's good for press. All the hotsies are in the front row, but one can't imagine them seriously taking what they're looking at seriously. Maybe enough to have a clever sound bite when the press asks what do they love or why is Dianne such a great Gal, but this is no Oscar de la Renta collection, or Michael Kors or even Catherine Malandrino. There is no real zip to it, just nice clothes. For this reason I have to give it a C . C is for cookie cutter.

Last but not least would be Tory Burch (right). I know what you're thinking...."She had a show at the tents too?" Well , yes, but so did half of Manhattan.Not to savage such a successful , fresh faced girl -next-door ( assuming you also live on Park Avenue) she put on a thankfully short and charming little show. Thank god it was only 27 exits or there probably been a mass exodus for the Tasti-Delite stand.It was a bit YSL, Chanel, Oscar,Kors(secondary collection Michael Kors) and some Ann Taylor for spice. I would venture to surmise some of it was probably straight out of her formidable wardrobe as well. Lots of shift dresses, safari looks, cardigans,tee shits , odd cargo pants and accessories galore.There was one great belted shift in a pointillist camouflage print that stood out, but all else was just a lot of look a like looks.Why does everyone think they're a designer? It's a disease. Her dish had a little bit of meat, a bland broth with an underlying fishy aftertaste . I guess if you have an army of EWES pumping dough into her already fatty coffers, she believes she is all that. Tory gets a P. P is passing but below grade level.
NEXT......

Believe me there was lots more to take apart, but my aim is not to bore or tire you, and a whole lot out is boring and tiresome, but these were standouts in that category. I'll tell you about some bright lights in the darkness on my next post. There were some truly great collections that took me by surprise. Design is alive and well in some corners of this town and it is inspiring to see them, even exciting!